Today has been a mix of emotions. I don't know where I am at this moment. I guess the word overwhelmed would be the best description of how scattered I feel.
The bad started last night when I realized that Hubby made it so more taxes were taken out of each paycheck, which is bad now, but will be good when taxes are due. The difference of over $400 each month was pretty surprising and more than eats up the money we spent on the old car payment. I was hoping to catch up on some things once we payed the car off, but things like car and house repairs, and our yearly house insurance payment have just prevented any catching up so far. Of course, if we hadn't paid off the car we would really be in a pickle right about now, so it's good that we do have the money for these type of things.
But last night I started to fret when I realized that I would have to wait even longer to sign up Ms. D for a special needs homeschool PSP. School in our neighborhood is a week and a half away, and I was hoping to get her signed up earlier this summer so that I can have more support in planning her first high school year. But costs like a failed smog test and new tires got in the way. I hadn't put much thought into what we were going to do this year because I wanted to consult with someone else who could assess Ms. D's abilities. I also have the regional center requirements for a new IQ test and some more documentation hanging over me. To top it off, I couldn't even find the old IQ test results. I remember putting it in a safe place after the regional center meeting in June, but I just can't find it. I didn't want Ms. D finding it and getting discouraged. Those safe places aren't really that safe! The bad in all this is obvious, but add to that a restless night worrying about it all. So I was searching and sorting through papers today on less than optimal sleep. Ok, the good...Hmmm...I got three boxes of papers waiting to be filed trimmed down to one small box. I was ruthless in the sorting and I know where the paperwork isn't! I also found a donation for some missionary friends that we misplaced. We have to contact the givers to make sure it's still OK to deposit the four month old check, but if it works out, our friends in Honduras will be blessed!
Another bad thing today was Mr. I had left his bike in front of his friend's house and the bike was stolen, even though their front door was open. The kids rushed out, but didn't get a good look at the thief. We had warned Mr. I about leaving his bike around, but he thought it would be safe. It obviously wasn't. The good out of this is one of our college aged neighbors saw my rant on Facebook and gave Mr. I his old bike. Mr. I hasn't seen it yet, but I'm so thankful for provision and for great neighbors!
Oh, and we got some good news today about a puppy for our own to raise until he is old enough to go to guide dog school. Yes, it's a male puppy born June 1st. He is half golden retriever and half yellow lab. Ms. D isn't too thrilled about a male dog with golden retriever in it because she's afraid the puppy will be too wild. But I think this will all change when she picks him up Saturday.
So even though I am overwhelmed, things are looking up in a lot of ways. I have to remind myself that God is really providing, even though I can't see how we are going to be able to make it. I'm not very good at stopping the worry monster, but I'm getting plenty of practice in learning how to overcome it. I will certainly be better off if I can learn to stop fretting. At the least I'll get more sleep!