Sunday, October 28, 2012

A Fun Time With Some of the Family

Tonight I went to Drumming Son's house with most of the family to watch the last game of the World Series. The Giants won!!!

I really needed a bit of a break, at least that's what people have been telling me. I guess I've not been able to hide my weariness lately as well as I had hoped. I don't think the tears during worship at church, the irritation with little things, or the lack of cheerfulness helped. There's just been a lot going on with the kids behaviorally and physically, and the coming meeting with the regional center is affecting my mood. I don't have a good track record when it comes to confronting schools, social workers, doctors, and the sort. I tend to back off and just handle things myself when the "authorities" drop the ball. That's a big reason why I'm homeschooling. Sometimes it's easier to do things myself than to force people to do what they should do in the first place. Sometimes I think that "navigating the system" is more challenging than raising special needs kids. I am just a mom who didn't finish college in the midst of a bunch of people with degrees and the power to help us or to push us aside. I need to advocate for my child, but I feel so inadequate. I think that feeling of inadequacy is what is pulling me down the most. I'll need more strength than I currently have to fight for Ms. D.

Today's game was a good excuse to get away and do something fun. It wasn't a complete rest, since Mr. I came with us and he needed a bit of extra attention. But still, it was a change of pace. I had a great time watching the game, and an even greater time watching Grandson play.
Grandson Playing Catch With Mr. I Before the Game
Drumming
Playing with Aunt and Uncle
I was so happy to spend time with the family tonight. It was good for me to focus on how blessed I am, instead of how poorly I am doing my job as a mother. And tonight, as I prayed with a friend in another country over the internet, I was reminded that God is big, and can handle all things. God can handle the regional center. God can handle Ms. D when she is an adult. God can be our advocate.

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